Monday, 25 July 2011

 Yes I am still awake and I thought I would take a moment to just blog. Not about photography not about my day, just how I feel at this moment. I am getting ready for bed I begin to realize this is the last time I will sleep in this house as Miss Tanja Maria Heffner. As I look at the room filled with all of our hard work, countless hours of glueing, sewing, stitching, typing, testing, trying and concluding I think to myself; it's going to pass us with a blink of an eye. It seems it was just a few moments ago I was slow dancing in warm cozy cabin in the middle of devils den on that crisp February day, with the unmistakeable aroma of fire wood lingering through the spaces between us. I can smell it now. That was a year and a half ago, and it flew by. It saddens me to think it's going to happen like a snap of your fingers and poof. I want to take the day in slow mo, take in each and every little moment of the day; but that's what Erika is there for. To fill in those gaps and remind me of the things I will forget or didnt catch. I have enjoyed so much these months of planning, organizing, sorting and finalizing. I cannot believe it has come so fast, yet I can. I knew it would, but at the same time didn't let myself believe it.

I am still just as excited as I was the day I knew I wanted to marry David. Well to be honest I'm more excited. Since meeting David my life has seemed surreal. I remember the first time I dropped him off at the airport and watched him walk through the gate. My heart began to tear and the pit of my stomach turned at the thought I may never see this man again. Yet no one has ever made me feel so free and inspired. Someone who pushed me to follow my dreams yet has dreams of his own. Someone who knows that if I say I'm fine, I'm not. Who somehow knows when I just need to be left to be, yet is there when I am more needy than photosynthesis needing light. Then shortly after I received flowers and we were skyping every hour of the day even being that couple that sometimes fell asleep on the laptop. The more the days passed by the more I knew we would make it work. Nothing could stop us, it wasn't going to be easy by any means but there was no way either of us would ever give up. Impossible is nothing.

I realize I am a twenty three year old "woman" , I believe an age to be considered a grown up but I feel like this is officially growing up. Looking at those baby pictures today was a blast from the past. The years of being a Heffner. A mommy's little girl to a momma's grown woman. I have enjoyed the years of being a Heffner but I am so ready to embark my life of being Mrs. Tanja Aden. I realize you don't have to be married for it to mean forever but I feel as Mr. and Mrs. we can officially take on the world. Make life happen, fulfill dreams, see wonderous things while being mesmerized by each other. I take on the Aden name with honour and gratitude. It's something I look forward to, I have an amazing family and it's just gotten bigger. These are the family that will send cards or even attend our childs first birthday party, celebrate anniversaries and unfortunately the tough times that each of us take on as some leave us. Here's to the future.

Ok I need to just cut it off and I'm sorry for rambling. I doubt you've made it this far reading it but thank you if you did.

Two more sleeps but technically speaking only 1 more day until the wedding.
I am utterly excited and I am thankful for all the readers and interest and complete patience you've all had with me.

Good night and don't let those bed bugs bite.

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About Me

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Liverpool, United Kingdom
I'm a former Arkansan who followed her heart to England. I began blogging to keep my family and friends back home up to date with my life and wedding preparations. Now I plan to explore further into the blogging of projects, inspirations, aspirations and just a look into my life. I am a photographer who is also trying to break through in this fast paced demanding world of photography. I love taking pictures, diying, blogging, running, baking and cooking getting caught in a good book and music that touches the soul. Thanks for stopping by.